Arguing with the Void

  • Kim

    I really like the imagery of the unknown as the void.

    I worked as a scientist a few years ago, and I really loved examining the fringes of the void, trying to push the light into the void just a tiny bit further. And no, the void never bothered me one bit. I found it fascinating. Still do. One way to think of it is as a land of imagination. We don’t know what the void really looks like, so why not dream something up and see what that dream means?

    Done right, this is hard work. It requires thinking very careful about the imagined rules, and whether they make sense, and working through what their consequences are. In the best case, there will be a way to go out and measure if the imagination happened to be correct. Usually it isn’t, and that’s hard too: nobody really enjoys being wrong. But it’s still fun to try. To explore. And if you genuinely find that you’re wrong, you get a pretty nice consolation prize: learning something new, which can give you new fuel for your imagination to go onto the next step.

    Anyway, I really do hope you find yourself in a better situation soon. I didn’t know it at the time, but I met one of my closest friends when she was going through a similar situation in her life. She recently told me that she would talk with me about physics (my degree: I was a graduate student at the time) in order to stave off thoughts of suicide. I really hope you have people in your life today that are of a similar comfort.

    Today, by the way, my friend is in a stable living situation with a husband and two children. Her life is challenging, but it’s on an upward track. I really, really hope that you find yourself in not necessarily that situation, but one that you are happy with.

  • Ahmed J. Ibrahim

    I pray and wish the best for you. Your youtube videos led me here. I was going through the comments and a number of people are asking for you there since you didnt apload for a long while.
    Life can be very tuff and will throw everything on you. But please stay the optimistic open minded energetic young lady i was watching her video for the past few days.

    Peace and blessings

    Your brother In Humanity

    • cynthiajeub

      Thank you so much, Ahmed. It means a lot to know I have brothers and sisters all over the world who are hoping to see me succeed. I am working on getting something up on YouTube soon.

  • Janice Toews

    I love your writing and your wisdom. I grew up fundy, but before the home schooling thing was popular, so I went to school, and eventually to university. I was fortunate to have good government support for university, and always had jobs, so never endured hunger or homelessness. I did not have your level of insight until much later in life. I used to have suicidal fantasies and believed that I would go to heaven, when I died, because I was ‘saved’.

    I’m retired on a paltry pension, now, or I would be your Patreon. Keep up the great writing. Hopefully you can eat enough every day. Hugs.